Nada rada

The 3rd December saw Fay's birthday come and go and her enter her 31st year. To celebrate, we opted to watch the local production of 'Glee', touted as a musical spectacular and accompanied with glitzy fliers and billboard posters. We went to the box office and were at first dissapointed as they seemed to be saying they had sold out, but were in fact saying we had to return on the day of the show. The theatre was full of character, grandeur and had a capacity of about 10,000. The 3rd came round and we made sure we were at the box office as soon as it opened so as not to miss our chance for a ticket. We were in luck, two box tickets were ours. That night we turned up early for the show and waited with anticipation. The start time came and went and the words 'get on with it' formed in my mind with ever increasing urgency and my patience meter began to run very low. Casting a by now irritable eye around the theatre, I should have read the warning signs - there were a maximum of 50 people and they looked very much like the mothers, fathers and grandparents of the cast that they indeed turned out to be. The 'spectacular' was in fact a b rate school production. 10 mins into the show and my ears began to bleed. Two and a half hours later, and the cast's own grandparents were thrwoing their granny undies at the stage to try and scare away their offspring and save the audience from any more torture. This was almost certainly the one situation where my joining in with the singing improved the quality. I remember a time at a wedding in Sweden where I tried to reinact that scene from dirty dancing where 'Baby' is caught by Patrick Swazyze and held aloft in the air. I tried to reinact it with the grooms mother and I was so drunk that although I somehow managed to persuade her it was a good idea, I completely lacked the co-ordinatrion to pull off such a feat. As she glided towards me in the air, everybody on the dancefloor knew it would end in tears. It did, but in comparisome to 'Glee', I was Patrick Swayze re-incarnated.